I am Wishing Away My Stepkids Childhood

As soon as you become a mother you’ll be amazed at how often you will hear people say “don’t blink, it goes by too fast.” They’ll say how your kids will seem to grow up so quickly and one day won’t need you the way they do when they are younger.

You want to know what’s interesting? When you become a stepmom, you won’t hear that. Nobody sits there and talks about how glorious it is to have young stepkids who have 3+ parents. You know what I do hear a lot? “Keep doing what you’re doing, it gets better.”

Well, when? When does it get better? When they’re old enough that you no longer have to deal with the other parent?

Instead of sitting here hoping my kids stay little forever, I find myself counting the years we have left until they’re 18.

Now, just so we’re clear it’s not at all because I don’t love my boys — because I most definitely do.

It’s everything else.

The show causes, the attorney fees, the obnoxious text messages, the supervised therapy, the co-parenting (or lack thereof), and the roller coaster of emotions that comes from kids not understanding why parents do the things they do.

The past two weeks alone we spent 5+ hours calling therapists to try to find ANYONE who will meet with these kids and their mother during COVID, attended consultations with attorneys, had court cases transferred to our new county, had a sheriff show up to our door with summons, and received a letter from the boys’ mother new attorney threatening us with additional court cases because we can’t find a therapist fast enough.

Even when you feel you’re doing everything the right way, you still end up having to spend thousands and thousands of dollars to go to court and prove to a judge (who only knows you for a couple hours before deciding the future of your family) that you deserve to keep your kids.

We’ve been pretty emotionally exhausted this week trying to keep it all together, on top of preparing our kids to start a totally new and unfamiliar way of schooling.

I can’t even imagine being able to raise a family with just one parent. Being able to continue day-to-day life without worrying that the visitation could change at any time.

Raising kids is amazing and I wish we could soak up every single moment of them being little without all the other nonsense that comes with raising a blended family.

I love love LOVE my kids but lately I find myself trying to blink just a little bit faster.